


Tell Me Something I Don't Know

by EliseInWonderland



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Crying, Cuddles, Cute, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, M/M, Mention of - Freeform, enjoy, he also doesn't like himself, suicidal ideations, this is also my first fic so, warning bc tyler is a smol bean and v emotional
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-07
Updated: 2017-02-07
Packaged: 2018-09-22 15:19:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9613514
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EliseInWonderland/pseuds/EliseInWonderland
Summary: There is a gnawing at the corner of Tyler’s mind.





	

**Author's Note:**

> hey, this is my first work in this fandom and on this website. i'd love nothing more than some feedback and constructive criticism, comments r gr8.
> 
> i apologize for the shittyness.

There is a gnawing at the corner of Tyler’s mind.

 

A groan resounds throughout the room, and it takes Tyler approximately six seconds to realize that the noise had come from him. The light shining through a crack in the curtains has him tucking the covers tightly under his chin and turning onto his side. The room is silent, save for the crows crying outside the window. His bedroom walls are a pale blue and Tyler can barely make out the brownish-yellowish-greenish  _ something  _ in the upper left corner. His eyes blink open then closed, slowly, and he isn’t quite sure of the state of consciousness he is currently in.

 

Just before Tyler is able to fall back into sleep (the gnawing is still there, not quite demanding his attention, but not quite muted either) he hears the sound of steps bounding towards the door. Tyler manages to wrench open an eye just in time to see the door open. A dark mop of curls is first to appear, quickly followed by warm eyes and a grin accompanied with dimples. Tyler smiles, but the action is too much of an effort. His smile drops.

 

Josh frowns, the crease between his brows endearing. His eyes soften, as if they couldn’t be more soft, and his grin turns sympathetic. “Still bad, huh?”

 

Tyler opens his mouth as if to respond, but all that leaves is a dry squeak from the back of his throat. He clears it, but it’s too late, he’s already forgot what he was going to say. Josh’s smile is completely gone now, and he quietly pads closer to the bed. He crouches down and places the back of his hand to tyler’s forehead, even though he know nothing will come of it. The gnawing gets a little harder.

 

“I’m not sick,” Tyler grunts, his voice hollow, “I just wanna fucking die.”

 

Josh’s frown deepens. He stares at tyler, mocha to chestnut, then sighs. He lifts his arm and drops it onto Tyler’s blanket clad one. He gives it a squeeze.

 

“Tyler,” he says softly. Always so soft, so gentle. Tyler doesn’t think he deserves this. “How can I help?”

 

Tyler can feel the burn is his eyes begin and,  _ dammit _ , he is  _ not  _ going to cry. He did enough of that last night. Josh sees the internal struggle, and merely squeezes his arm again, patiently waiting for a response. Tyler takes a long breath. “Join me?” He asks weakly. Always so weak. The gnawing is turning into bites now.

 

He pulls the blanket tighter, and the hint of a smile appears on Josh’s face. “How can I say no to that?” He teases. Tyler doesn’t laugh. He doesn’t know if he has any laughter left in him.

 

Josh lifts up the blanket and slides in next to Tyler. Tyler shimmies to the side to give Josh some extra room, then places his head on his chest once they have both settled. Josh’s hand immediately wraps around Tyler’s waist, fingers ghosting the hem of his shirt. Tyler shivers at the warmth of his touch.

 

“Wanna talk?” Josh asks him quietly. 

 

Talk? Tyler isn’t even sure he has the energy to give more than a few half hearted grunts. He’s not sure what he’d even say if he did.  _ I’m a fucking failure, the sight of myself in the mirror makes me sick, I should just end my life and, oh, yeah, we’re out of milk.  _ Tyler closes his eyes. Sharp teeth sink into his brain.

 

“Okay,” Josh breathes, he understands. He rests his head towards Tyler’s, fingers never once stopping their movements on his waist.

 

It’s not that he doesn’t want to talk about it. He just can’t. He hates the look Josh gets in his eyes every time Tyler tells him his views on his own self worth. It’s not pitying, it’s much, much worse, as if the things he says about himself aren’t true at all, but Tyler knows better, he knows the truth, knows that he doesn’t deserve to have someone hold him and reassure him that his  _ facts _ aren’t true. They’re so,  _ so  _ true. 

 

Josh just can’t see it.

 

The chew toy breaks. Warmth blossoms onto his cheek and spreads, before the drop falls with the faintest pat onto Josh’s chest. The stain is small and dark on his shirt, and it is soon followed by two, three, six more, the inch radius of drop number one soaked. 

 

“Hey, hey,” Josh coos, shifting them so that his back is against the headboard and Tyler is nothing more than a ball in his lap. Josh places a finger under his chin and tilts it up, until Tyler is forced to stare at him through blurry eyes. A moment passes before a choked sob leaves his throat, and then the tears really start to flow. Tyler buries his face into the crook of Josh’s neck, shoulders shaking. He really hates himself right now.

 

“Tyler,” Josh breathes, placing his hand on the nape of Tyler’s neck, protecting, “Tell me what’s wrong, baby.”

Tyler cries harder.

 

Josh can only hold him.

 

Tyler’s body shudders with the force of his tears and Josh feels them slide down his neck and fall onto his shoulder. For a second, he thinks Tyler might drown them both. Tyler gasps, and tries to suck in a shaky breath. “Why are- Josh, why are you here?” Tyler’s fist curls and his eyes close, he hopes to hold back enough tears to get through Josh’s answer.

 

Josh is confused. “Ty, I live here,” he reminds him. He cocks his head to the side, his other hand stroking up and down Tyler’s back. Tyler just shakes his head, a few tears falling. Josh thinks maybe he should have gotten some tissues.

 

“Why are you  _ here _ , Josh?” He croaks, leaning back to look at him.

 

Josh just stares blankly at him, before realization dawns. He grabs Tyler’s wrists in his hands and slides them into Tyler’s own, gently unfurling his fists. He brings them up to his face, so close that Tyler can feel his breath tickle his knuckles, and he places a kiss on each of them.

 

“Because I love you,” he states simply. Tyler frowns.

 

“But why? Josh, I’m such a mess.”

 

“I’m good at cleaning.”

 

Josh expects maybe a smile to match his smirk, but Tyler’s face crumples and he pulls away, trying to leave the bed. Josh quickly reaches for his wrist, tugging him back towards him. “Sorry, sorry, not the time for jokes.” Tyler just shakes his head.

 

“No, I-” A hiccup. “I just don’t get it.”

 

Josh sighs. “What’s not to get? I love you, plain and simple.”

 

“But-”

 

“Tyler,” he breathes, bringing his hands up to cup Tyler’s face. “Stop. Stop doubting me, stop doubting yourself. Stop talking like this. Everything, just stop.” 

Tyler stops. It’s quiet, and the crows are gone. He lets out a shaky breath and his face relaxes.

 

Tyler hiccups again. He stares at Josh for a long moment, then nods. Josh brings him into a hug and holds tight.

 

When Tyler finally sits up, wiping the few remaining tears from his eyes with the back of his hand, he blinks at Josh and smiles. Josh smiles back and thinks that this may very well be his favorite image.

 

“Uh, yeah. Thanks, Joshie.” Josh’s raises his brows. His grin widens and he laughs, and Tyler looks away, face still pink and flustered. He lands a playful punch onto Josh’s bicep, chuckling along. He found the laughter.

 

“No problem.” 

 

Josh’s eyes are crinkling in a way that makes Tyler’s chest burst. He doesn’t know if it’s out of love or if he should see a doctor. He narrows his eyes as Josh leans forward, and they fall closed the second he feels warm lips against his own. He sits there for a moment, but then his heart is pumping and he’s tilting his head and cupping Josh’s cheek, deepening the kiss.

 

He feels the puffs of breath from Josh’s nose ghost against his eyelashes, and the softness of his hair as he tugs it reminds Tyler of a blanket he used to have as a kid. He tastes like peppermint and his scent makes Tyler think of pine trees and camping, or the forest just a few miles away from their apartment. He’s done this so many times before, but it feels like their first all over again. 

 

When they break away for air, Tyler closes his eyes and leans his forehead against Josh’s. They take some time to savour the moment before Josh is lying back down and Tyler is following him, head finding it’s home on Josh’s familiar chest.

 

Tyler yawns and Josh wraps his arms around his waist. He places a kiss on the top of Tyler’s head.

 

“Hey, Josh?” Tyler mumbles, the fog of sleep heavy in his voice.

 

“Hm?” Ever so soft.

 

“I love you, too.”

  
Tyler notices that the gnawing didn’t come back.


End file.
